Be the Authentic You

Be the Authentic

Are you up for a challenge? What would happen if you were true to yourself for an entire week? What if you dressed without thinking of others’ opinions, said no to events you don’t want to attend, chose pizza instead of a salad in front of your healthy friends, chose to work on your project on a Saturday night instead of partying?

I believe that when we try our best to be our authentic selfs and do what we truly want to do, we are happier individuals. When we care less about what’s cool and what’s not, we put less unnecessary pressure on ourselves.

How many times per week do you push away that voice inside of you? How many times per day? Take a moment to reflect.

It’s time to try to let go of all the pressure and commands the society puts on you. You are you. You are your soul. You have a body. You are alive. You are life. You are perfect just as you are. You can improve, but only in the way you want to.

Let go of these;

  • You have to have smart answers
  • You have to have a certain size of breasts and bottom
  • You have to have a certain length
  • You have to be interested in football if you’re a man
  • You have to love make-up if you’re a woman
  • You have to have perfect skin to be beautiful
  • You have to be like your friends
  • You have to get a real job
  • You have to live up to your parents’ expectations

Let go of these for a moment and do what you feel like doing. Who are you, authentically?

I, for instance, am a 20-year-old girl from Sweden. I think that according to the society I live in, I should be studying at university or be an employee at a company. Maybe even both. I should use Tinder and go on more or less serious dates and party almost every week. Make sure my hair is long and luscious, have minimalistic clothes and make up on fleek. I should try to get in to the most fancy and superficial clubs with my styled up friends. Make out with one or two handsome men on the dance floor. Maybe follow one of them home and then never see them again. Save up money to travel in Asia for months with my friends. I should be yoooung and freeee. Also, according to the world, I should be blond and blue-eyed with a hot body but a slightly cold heart.

This description above is of an average girl in my age from my city. And there is no wrong whatsoever. It actually sounds like a fun life. But it’s not my life.

I might be 20, but I feel more like 25. I would only want to study courses at university as I want to be build my own businesses at an early age and also learn from doing. I refuse to get Tinder as I know that it would only distract me from what truly matters to me – family, friends, personal development and career. I party only once or twice a month as the clubbing life can get too superficial for me. I prefer bars with a good ambiance. I almost never kiss a stranger unless I really really feel attracted to them. I think my friends have only seen me kiss someone who wasn’t my boyfriend once ,when we were out. Alcohol does a lot to you, and I have also been a victim of it. But still, I barely follow anyone home as it feels quite meaningless to me. I’m still young and free! I’m also far from blond and blue-eyed (as I’m half Swedish) but I still feel as Swedish as my blond friends. No one should try to take that away from me.

I choose my own path and I always have. Sometimes you feel lonely from doing that since you leave the crowd. But trust me, you’ll find your like-minded. I don’t care if people raise an eyebrow at my choices. If they think I’m too prude, emotional or romantic. It’s my responsibility to myself to follow my intuition and do what’s right for me.

In conclusion, you do you. Really do you. Don’t be afraid to show your real colors. Be proud and those who can’t handle it – let them go. You’ll find your people anyway.

Have a great Friday, beautiful!

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À Bientôt, Paris! ♡

 

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The end of a chapter and the beginning of another.

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My last week in Paris has come to an end. Tomorrow is the day I fly home after nine whole months here. Three quarters of a year. Even if it’s not that long, it feels like I’ve done, seen and experienced so much.

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When I came here, I instantly felt home. Maybe it was because I had spent 10 months planning and visualizing it. But really, I felt completely comfortable here. I tried to eat more Nutella in the morning á la France, drink more wine á la France, say “putain!” á la France. I didn’t feel homesick. Maybe because I kept some Swedishness in my life as well.

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Paris will always mean so much to me. It will be a special symbol for me. Not only a symbol of love, light and fashion. But a symbol of my first big adventure. The start of my adulthood. I will one day think back to the curious and passionate 19-year-old I once was and how I used to walk these streets. Or should I say “rues”?

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Even if I have to leave Paris now, it’s not goodbye forever. I’m very open to come back one day soon. I need to be in Stockholm for the rest of the year. Then I need a new city. But Paris, will always be one of my homes.

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Standing here packing everything, I realize how tough I actually am. I feel myself cheering for me. Once upon a time I worked almost 6 days a week, skipped having a free summer, packed almost everything I own and came here. I lived, I loved and went through hardships. I got closer to myself and made the right decision for my own sake. And now I am packing to get ready to take a flight home. I know what I have to do. Going home is not taking a step back. But a gigantic step forward. Why – I will tell you one day.

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I want to take this opportunity to thank all the people I’ve met here. French, Swedes, Australians, Brits, Irish, Tunisians, Russians, Austrians, Americans, Polish and so many more interesting nationalities. Thank you for teaching me so much about your home countries and cultures, especially you French. Thank you to the people who took care of me with pep talk, food and company when I needed it the most. I’ve made so many new friends and tied bonds between not only Sweden and France but between Sweden and everywhere! You know who you are. Let’s keep follow each other’s unique journeys and see each other again soon.

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This experience has made me even more excited about moving to other countries. This is just the beginning of an endless love story with life.


Gypsy Life ♡

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I am a lover of my home country, Sweden. I love my city, Stockholm. This will always be my true home. But I’m also an exploring soul. I want to not only travel, but to move around a lot in my twenties. When I was 19 and was planning my little adventure Paris, I also thought of other places I wanted to live in. I thought; “why not spend the next few years moving around to countries I want to try the life in?”. I still agree on that idea. My life in Paris is coming to an end and I’ll move home to Stockholm. But only for a few months. Then I want to continue to the UK. And then…

Los Angeles, New York, Australia, Germany, The Netherlands and maybe even Japan and Singapore. Without chronological order.

I identify so much with Lady Gaga’s song “Gypsy”. I want to move around, explore cultures and traditions, learn languages, connect with people all over the world. I’ve always been a curious person and a sucker for experiences. Right now I’m free. Right now I’m alone. I don’t want to be alone forever, but I can be right now. I can travel around by myself until I find someone who wants to come along. I want to move around until I choose to settle down somewhere in the world to build a family.

I’ve always felt like my path was unlike many others’. I don’t want to be locked in a university for 3-5 years. I want life to be my university. Does anyone feel me?

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Messy Mind

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Sometimes we feel like our minds are working so much it’s too much. Thinking becomes overthinking. Our mind is a mess. The thoughts and the emotions makes it hard to focus on our daily tasks, hard to focus on what people are saying to us, hard to relax and to see things clearly. We have all been there.

What can we do towards overthinking? How do we make it stop? By letting it out. I’ve been a master of keeping my thoughts and emotions inside my head. It gets crowdy in there. The older I get, the better I get at sharing and letting these thoughts out. Most of these things are things you can’t control. This is so important to remember.

Let the thoughts out by;

– Talking to someone who is related to what you’re overthinking about. Your parent, your friend, partner etc. It’s a scary thing to do. But it will take you forward and you won’t feel stuck and anxious anymore. Sometimes letting your feelings out can break relationships because you’re not met with understanding or forgiveness. If that is the case, you can only accept and try your best to move on.

– Finding someone who is willing to listen to you expressing how you feel. Let this person take everything in and give you their input. It will probably make you see it from another perspective and calm you down a lot. It can be your best friend or a professional like a therapist. Don’t be ashamed to speak to someone who’s educatated to listen!

– Writing down every thought and emotion. If you wish you could express yourself to someone but for some reason can’t, write a letter to them. You don’t have to send it. It’s simply for letting your thoughts out. If your thoughts are not related to a person, writing can still be very helpful. Write everything down as properly as you can and put your note somewhere where you can’t see it. When you’re in a relaxed state or just in a good mood, take out your note and read with “new eyes” and a clear mind. Maybe you can now find the best advice for yourself. Remember that the truth is always within you.

I hope this was helpful. I’ve been experiencing a messy mind lately and I try to clear it as much as I can. I use all of these methods and it helps a bunch.

Good luck❤️

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Becoming Who I Want To Be – The First Month

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One month ago I started a project. A project to go from being lost and unmotivated, to get back to joyful me and from there become the ideal me. On the 16th of May I wrote down my feelings and my goals for the next coming month of this project in a blog post. You can read it here. Now it’s been a month and it’s time to share my progress, thoughts and reflections of my journey. The challenge is to not make this too long. Here we go;

How I felt one month ago

I felt lost. I felt small in a giant world. I felt like I had the answer deep down in me and that my soul was calling for reunion. But I felt like I was on a roller coaster. It was up and down. I felt anxiety and peace. The soul and the ego were fighting over me. I felt lonely, unmotivated, uninspired, unloved, miserabel. I felt like I was far away from family and true friends. I felt like I was on the wrong path in my career. I was stuck.

How I feel now

I feel sooo much more like my old happy self. I feel the joy and love for life again. I’m motivated and excited to work on myself and become my ideal me in a few months. I work every day towards her. It’s still not perfect though. I sleep at the wrong hours and sometimes I’d rather watch Youtube videos that to write. But I’m definitely feeling more peaceful within. I wake up feeling happy and I go to bed with a smile.

What have I done this month?

Week 1 – During the first week I wrote down who the ideal me is and what her habits are. I had weekly goals that were pretty high. But I was still so down. I was so unproductive. I didn’t even achieve half of the goals for the week since I was so unmotivated and lost. I felt emotional pain and anxiety. I cried at some point every day of the week. It was like I knew what I had to do but it was so hard. I felt stuck. That weekend someone told me I had to get a break and took me to Normandie in west of France. I still felt so much in my head, but the nature, the ocean and the feeling of summer made me feel better and more peaceful. I knew in my heart that I was going in the right direction. But it was tough.

Week 2 – The week started in a good mood after the trip. I felt reloaded with energy. I still had quite high goals on myself. I planned many friend dates – girl nights in, clubbing, dinners etc. I felt ok, but it was still a bit of a roller coaster. I could feel happy and then much less happy after an hour. I wasn’t productive enough to achieve my weekly goals and I realized that I needed more time for myself next week.

Week 3 – I planned to have more me-time this week but because of various reasons, I couldn’t be by myself as much as I had hoped to. The first two days of the week I still felt this ball of anxiety in my stomach. I felt helpless. I woke up every morning feeling empty. On the Tuesday I thought about one of my options and thought about it seriously for a while. The same afternoon, I discussed this with my mother and the more we talked about it, the more it felt right. I made a decision – to go home in July. I understood that Paris can’t give me what I need right now. Stockholm can. Ones I made the decision, I felt liberated. I felt less anxious. The old me was slowly coming back. I slowly became more joyful. I started to visualize the rest of my year; one month of just breathing, reading, family time and meeting up with all my friends. Then update my CV and LinkedIn profile to go all in for my career and find a job that I felt passionate about. I would work there for about a half year and then pack my bags again to go to my next destination. Oh it sounded perfect! And actually, deciding to go home made my love for Paris flourish. I wanted to enjoy it as much as I could.

This week I also became kinder towards myself. My weekly goals were low and focused mainly on taking care of myself spiritually, mentally and physically. I felt like my foundation needed nourishment before building career and relationships. That Saturday we also had the TEDx event and I felt so alive working with the team and in the TEDx spirit. These are the types of things and the types of people I want to work with full time!

Week 4 – I finally started to feel more balanced between me-time and social life. I focused on me the first half of the week and then planned fun stuff for the second half. I felt like I got much more time with myself and that was very needed. I slept better (but the wrong hours; 3 am to 11 pm), meditated more and got more exercise going. I fell in love with Pilates and did several sessions. I was very satisfied with myself – I was being much more productive. I could separate the voice of my soul from the voice of my ego. Instead of feeling lonely, I loved me-time. I even reduced my usage of Facebook and spent that time on rewriting my vision, creating a “meditation spot” and writing. The only negative aspects were my crazy sleeping hours, my unbalanced diet (sometimes no breakfast, not much protein, not much vegetables and fruits) and that every day, the first one or two hours I would feel a bit down. But it would turn as my positivity kicked in and I would feel really good for the rest of the day. But I think clearer. I know what I want and what I need. I feel like myself again. I’m excited.

Week 5 – This week I’m still not getting up as early as I would like to because I fall asleep so late. But I am seeing more consistency in other habits! I’m eating more balanced. I am drinking many more glasses of water every day. I work out 3-4 times a week. I subconsciously take up my notebook and read through my weekly and daily goals several times a day. Even my mental habits are healthier (not judging, hating, more understanding etc.)! I’m also craving work. So this week I started to slowly do some more work and I even got a new client. I’m balanced between me-time, work and social life. I’m excited about going home to Sweden but I’m also excited to see and experience as much as I can of Paris ❤

Did I reach my goals?

In the previous post about this journey I had a few goals for the coming month.

  • Improved some of my habits, at least one should be consistent
    • ✓ At least two are very consistent; weekly/daily goals and my water intake.
  • See a change in myself, physically, mentally and spiritually
    • ✓ I’m already seeing results from the Pilates, I’m having a more loving and understanding thinking and I’m feeling closer to my soul.
  • Improved in achieving my weekly goals
    • ✓ I went from achieving less than half to achieving at least two thirds!
  • Improved my time management
    • ✓ My time management is definitely better; Mon – Fri me-time and work, Fri-Sun friends and fun stuff!
  • Improved my social life
    • ✓ I’ve seen a lot of friends and strengthened my relationships over the last few weeks. I’m just sad over leaving them! 😦
  • Gotten closer to my career goals
    • ✓ Yes, slightly closer as I have focused more on my well-being than my career this month, but the Happy Careerista brand is getting stronger and I did get some work done (and a new client) for my freelance biz.
  • Feel happier than I did this month – wake up with happiness, gratitude and love in me
    • ✓ 100% happier and feeling so much more like myself again!

So I nailed all the goals! Woo!

Next month I want to

  • Have two more habits consistent (consistent sleeping schedule should be one of them)
  • Feel even more evolved physically, mentally and spiritually
  • Have seen as much as I can of Paris (been up in the Eiffel Tower, exhibitions, been inside Sacré Coeur, gone Versailles etc.)
  • Have an idea of what I want to do when I get home and have some sort of plan
  • Make Happy Careerista even stronger!
  • Happily fly home to Stockholm ❤

If you managed to get through the whole text – thank you for coming by! Another update will be coming July 4th. Meanwhile;

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Empower Someone!

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Now I’m all about personal development and being focused on achieving ones goals. But sometimes ambitious people tend to get so absorbed in their own little world that they forget to see the people around them and how they’re feeling. Sometimes someone close to you is feeling lost, unhappy, sad, lonely or something else that they don’t want to bother you with but wishes you would see. Trust me, I know how hard it is for some people to ask for help and support. I’ve been there and I’m still a bit too proud to say “hey, I’m not doing very good at the moment. I really need your presence right now”. Many of us hopes for someone to see how we are feeling and to ask the simple question “how are you?”.

Of course it’s hard to always notice how someone is feeling if they don’t say anything or have a really good poker face. But it’s easy to take a few minutes a week to empower someone by saying something nice. Because a few kind words can make someone’s day!

Tell your partner that tonight’s dinner was delicious.

Comment someone’s Instagram picture with a simple compliment.

Tell your best friend that you miss them.

Tell your mother that her dress looks great on her.

Every day I try to use the time I scroll through my Instagram feed to write some kind comments. I also try to give at least one compliment to everyone I talk to during the day. Make it a habit to make people feel good about themselves. See them. Hear them. Touch them.

Happy Monday and have a lovely week!

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Share Your Story

Share your story

Let’s get right into it;

Starting in June, I want to share stories with you from people I’ve stumbled across the last few years. People who all have a story and a message they want me to share with you. They come from all over the world, with different occupassions and different stories. All to inspire you in a certain domain in life.

I am still open for more stories to share! If you have a message you would like to get out through this blog, I would love to hear more about you and what you want to tell the world. Send me an email to happycareerista@gmail.com 🙂

Stay tuned!

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