Be the Authentic You

Be the Authentic

Are you up for a challenge? What would happen if you were true to yourself for an entire week? What if you dressed without thinking of others’ opinions, said no to events you don’t want to attend, chose pizza instead of a salad in front of your healthy friends, chose to work on your project on a Saturday night instead of partying?

I believe that when we try our best to be our authentic selfs and do what we truly want to do, we are happier individuals. When we care less about what’s cool and what’s not, we put less unnecessary pressure on ourselves.

How many times per week do you push away that voice inside of you? How many times per day? Take a moment to reflect.

It’s time to try to let go of all the pressure and commands the society puts on you. You are you. You are your soul. You have a body. You are alive. You are life. You are perfect just as you are. You can improve, but only in the way you want to.

Let go of these;

  • You have to have smart answers
  • You have to have a certain size of breasts and bottom
  • You have to have a certain length
  • You have to be interested in football if you’re a man
  • You have to love make-up if you’re a woman
  • You have to have perfect skin to be beautiful
  • You have to be like your friends
  • You have to get a real job
  • You have to live up to your parents’ expectations

Let go of these for a moment and do what you feel like doing. Who are you, authentically?

I, for instance, am a 20-year-old girl from Sweden. I think that according to the society I live in, I should be studying at university or be an employee at a company. Maybe even both. I should use Tinder and go on more or less serious dates and party almost every week. Make sure my hair is long and luscious, have minimalistic clothes and make up on fleek. I should try to get in to the most fancy and superficial clubs with my styled up friends. Make out with one or two handsome men on the dance floor. Maybe follow one of them home and then never see them again. Save up money to travel in Asia for months with my friends. I should be yoooung and freeee. Also, according to the world, I should be blond and blue-eyed with a hot body but a slightly cold heart.

This description above is of an average girl in my age from my city. And there is no wrong whatsoever. It actually sounds like a fun life. But it’s not my life.

I might be 20, but I feel more like 25. I would only want to study courses at university as I want to be build my own businesses at an early age and also learn from doing. I refuse to get Tinder as I know that it would only distract me from what truly matters to me – family, friends, personal development and career. I party only once or twice a month as the clubbing life can get too superficial for me. I prefer bars with a good ambiance. I almost never kiss a stranger unless I really really feel attracted to them. I think my friends have only seen me kiss someone who wasn’t my boyfriend once ,when we were out. Alcohol does a lot to you, and I have also been a victim of it. But still, I barely follow anyone home as it feels quite meaningless to me. I’m still young and free! I’m also far from blond and blue-eyed (as I’m half Swedish) but I still feel as Swedish as my blond friends. No one should try to take that away from me.

I choose my own path and I always have. Sometimes you feel lonely from doing that since you leave the crowd. But trust me, you’ll find your like-minded. I don’t care if people raise an eyebrow at my choices. If they think I’m too prude, emotional or romantic. It’s my responsibility to myself to follow my intuition and do what’s right for me.

In conclusion, you do you. Really do you. Don’t be afraid to show your real colors. Be proud and those who can’t handle it – let them go. You’ll find your people anyway.

Have a great Friday, beautiful!

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Quotes June 2016

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The biggest goal of all is to live a happy and fulfilling life💜

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Mindful meditation, mindful shower, mindful eating, mindful walk, mindful loving… Observe life. Listen, touch, taste and feeel. Feeling relaxed already?😉✨

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Happiness starts within. You have to be alone and happy alone sometimes to find out who you are, what you want and the rest will come when you’re happy by yourself. Trust that💞

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Don’t worry. This is the turn! Sending you all love and strength❤️

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Who’s feeling me right now?😅☕️ Good morning and have a productive week fellow Careeristas and Careerists!🔥

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There have been so many times when emotions and thoughts have gotten all tangled up in my head and I really can’t think clearly. Do you know that feeling? Especially hard is it when you have to make a choice. Path A or B. Imagine the voice of a guru. That is the tone of your soul’s voice. Steady, deep and peaceful. Listening to your heart is another word for listening to your soul. You have to seek tranquility in order to hear the steady, calm answer. Search your heart and the right answer will be waiting for you there💜💫

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Installing a habit takes about 66 days so don’t worry if you haven’t nailed them all yet. Actually, start installing one habit at the time. It’s not always about rushing but to properly build consistency. This week I’m working on my sleep. 10 pm to 6 am. How about you??😏

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Every day I’m hustlin’. Happy Friday!✨🔥💫
What are your plans today? Working all morning and afternoon to enjoy a Friday night with friends💫

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Are you waking up and falling asleep feeling grateful for your life and the people in it?

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Truth is, I grew up with only the love of a mother. I didn’t have a big family, siblings, a father. I’ve had many good friends but also bad ones. I’ve gone through relationships that have hurt me. But the older I get, the stronger and more open hearted I get. I realize that I crave a love deep as the ocean since I want to give just as much❣

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When I decide to commit to a partner, I want us to be a team. To be best friends. To share our ups and downs. To be able to be 100% ourselves and laugh, live, love❤️🔥

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Relating so much to this line from “Gypsy” by my queen@ladygaga. I’m in a point in life where I have to spend time alone and explore on my own. I don’t want to be alone forever, but I can be right now.

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I just need my key people who support me, make me laugh and love me just the way I am!🔑🔑👯

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Everyone should do positive affirmations. Mine right now is; “I am love and light”. ❤️✨❤️✨❤️

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Happy Careerista Statistics;
Blog followers: 55
Facebook likes: 134
Instagram followers: 8733
Twitter followers: 427
Snapchat friends: 18
Good morning, followers! Have a great grind week!🔥

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Up until around 12, I also wanted to fit in. I wanted to be like the cool kids. But then I realized I’m not like them. And I don’t want to be. I embraced what I truly am and still I’m getting more and more purely me✨

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Match that beautiful outside with an even more beautiful inside!✨✨

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Glad midsommar/happy summer solstice!☀️

More at www.instagram.com/happycareerista

Messy Mind

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Sometimes we feel like our minds are working so much it’s too much. Thinking becomes overthinking. Our mind is a mess. The thoughts and the emotions makes it hard to focus on our daily tasks, hard to focus on what people are saying to us, hard to relax and to see things clearly. We have all been there.

What can we do towards overthinking? How do we make it stop? By letting it out. I’ve been a master of keeping my thoughts and emotions inside my head. It gets crowdy in there. The older I get, the better I get at sharing and letting these thoughts out. Most of these things are things you can’t control. This is so important to remember.

Let the thoughts out by;

– Talking to someone who is related to what you’re overthinking about. Your parent, your friend, partner etc. It’s a scary thing to do. But it will take you forward and you won’t feel stuck and anxious anymore. Sometimes letting your feelings out can break relationships because you’re not met with understanding or forgiveness. If that is the case, you can only accept and try your best to move on.

– Finding someone who is willing to listen to you expressing how you feel. Let this person take everything in and give you their input. It will probably make you see it from another perspective and calm you down a lot. It can be your best friend or a professional like a therapist. Don’t be ashamed to speak to someone who’s educatated to listen!

– Writing down every thought and emotion. If you wish you could express yourself to someone but for some reason can’t, write a letter to them. You don’t have to send it. It’s simply for letting your thoughts out. If your thoughts are not related to a person, writing can still be very helpful. Write everything down as properly as you can and put your note somewhere where you can’t see it. When you’re in a relaxed state or just in a good mood, take out your note and read with “new eyes” and a clear mind. Maybe you can now find the best advice for yourself. Remember that the truth is always within you.

I hope this was helpful. I’ve been experiencing a messy mind lately and I try to clear it as much as I can. I use all of these methods and it helps a bunch.

Good luck❤️

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Becoming Who I Want To Be – The First Month

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One month ago I started a project. A project to go from being lost and unmotivated, to get back to joyful me and from there become the ideal me. On the 16th of May I wrote down my feelings and my goals for the next coming month of this project in a blog post. You can read it here. Now it’s been a month and it’s time to share my progress, thoughts and reflections of my journey. The challenge is to not make this too long. Here we go;

How I felt one month ago

I felt lost. I felt small in a giant world. I felt like I had the answer deep down in me and that my soul was calling for reunion. But I felt like I was on a roller coaster. It was up and down. I felt anxiety and peace. The soul and the ego were fighting over me. I felt lonely, unmotivated, uninspired, unloved, miserabel. I felt like I was far away from family and true friends. I felt like I was on the wrong path in my career. I was stuck.

How I feel now

I feel sooo much more like my old happy self. I feel the joy and love for life again. I’m motivated and excited to work on myself and become my ideal me in a few months. I work every day towards her. It’s still not perfect though. I sleep at the wrong hours and sometimes I’d rather watch Youtube videos that to write. But I’m definitely feeling more peaceful within. I wake up feeling happy and I go to bed with a smile.

What have I done this month?

Week 1 – During the first week I wrote down who the ideal me is and what her habits are. I had weekly goals that were pretty high. But I was still so down. I was so unproductive. I didn’t even achieve half of the goals for the week since I was so unmotivated and lost. I felt emotional pain and anxiety. I cried at some point every day of the week. It was like I knew what I had to do but it was so hard. I felt stuck. That weekend someone told me I had to get a break and took me to Normandie in west of France. I still felt so much in my head, but the nature, the ocean and the feeling of summer made me feel better and more peaceful. I knew in my heart that I was going in the right direction. But it was tough.

Week 2 – The week started in a good mood after the trip. I felt reloaded with energy. I still had quite high goals on myself. I planned many friend dates – girl nights in, clubbing, dinners etc. I felt ok, but it was still a bit of a roller coaster. I could feel happy and then much less happy after an hour. I wasn’t productive enough to achieve my weekly goals and I realized that I needed more time for myself next week.

Week 3 – I planned to have more me-time this week but because of various reasons, I couldn’t be by myself as much as I had hoped to. The first two days of the week I still felt this ball of anxiety in my stomach. I felt helpless. I woke up every morning feeling empty. On the Tuesday I thought about one of my options and thought about it seriously for a while. The same afternoon, I discussed this with my mother and the more we talked about it, the more it felt right. I made a decision – to go home in July. I understood that Paris can’t give me what I need right now. Stockholm can. Ones I made the decision, I felt liberated. I felt less anxious. The old me was slowly coming back. I slowly became more joyful. I started to visualize the rest of my year; one month of just breathing, reading, family time and meeting up with all my friends. Then update my CV and LinkedIn profile to go all in for my career and find a job that I felt passionate about. I would work there for about a half year and then pack my bags again to go to my next destination. Oh it sounded perfect! And actually, deciding to go home made my love for Paris flourish. I wanted to enjoy it as much as I could.

This week I also became kinder towards myself. My weekly goals were low and focused mainly on taking care of myself spiritually, mentally and physically. I felt like my foundation needed nourishment before building career and relationships. That Saturday we also had the TEDx event and I felt so alive working with the team and in the TEDx spirit. These are the types of things and the types of people I want to work with full time!

Week 4 – I finally started to feel more balanced between me-time and social life. I focused on me the first half of the week and then planned fun stuff for the second half. I felt like I got much more time with myself and that was very needed. I slept better (but the wrong hours; 3 am to 11 pm), meditated more and got more exercise going. I fell in love with Pilates and did several sessions. I was very satisfied with myself – I was being much more productive. I could separate the voice of my soul from the voice of my ego. Instead of feeling lonely, I loved me-time. I even reduced my usage of Facebook and spent that time on rewriting my vision, creating a “meditation spot” and writing. The only negative aspects were my crazy sleeping hours, my unbalanced diet (sometimes no breakfast, not much protein, not much vegetables and fruits) and that every day, the first one or two hours I would feel a bit down. But it would turn as my positivity kicked in and I would feel really good for the rest of the day. But I think clearer. I know what I want and what I need. I feel like myself again. I’m excited.

Week 5 – This week I’m still not getting up as early as I would like to because I fall asleep so late. But I am seeing more consistency in other habits! I’m eating more balanced. I am drinking many more glasses of water every day. I work out 3-4 times a week. I subconsciously take up my notebook and read through my weekly and daily goals several times a day. Even my mental habits are healthier (not judging, hating, more understanding etc.)! I’m also craving work. So this week I started to slowly do some more work and I even got a new client. I’m balanced between me-time, work and social life. I’m excited about going home to Sweden but I’m also excited to see and experience as much as I can of Paris ❤

Did I reach my goals?

In the previous post about this journey I had a few goals for the coming month.

  • Improved some of my habits, at least one should be consistent
    • ✓ At least two are very consistent; weekly/daily goals and my water intake.
  • See a change in myself, physically, mentally and spiritually
    • ✓ I’m already seeing results from the Pilates, I’m having a more loving and understanding thinking and I’m feeling closer to my soul.
  • Improved in achieving my weekly goals
    • ✓ I went from achieving less than half to achieving at least two thirds!
  • Improved my time management
    • ✓ My time management is definitely better; Mon – Fri me-time and work, Fri-Sun friends and fun stuff!
  • Improved my social life
    • ✓ I’ve seen a lot of friends and strengthened my relationships over the last few weeks. I’m just sad over leaving them! 😦
  • Gotten closer to my career goals
    • ✓ Yes, slightly closer as I have focused more on my well-being than my career this month, but the Happy Careerista brand is getting stronger and I did get some work done (and a new client) for my freelance biz.
  • Feel happier than I did this month – wake up with happiness, gratitude and love in me
    • ✓ 100% happier and feeling so much more like myself again!

So I nailed all the goals! Woo!

Next month I want to

  • Have two more habits consistent (consistent sleeping schedule should be one of them)
  • Feel even more evolved physically, mentally and spiritually
  • Have seen as much as I can of Paris (been up in the Eiffel Tower, exhibitions, been inside Sacré Coeur, gone Versailles etc.)
  • Have an idea of what I want to do when I get home and have some sort of plan
  • Make Happy Careerista even stronger!
  • Happily fly home to Stockholm ❤

If you managed to get through the whole text – thank you for coming by! Another update will be coming July 4th. Meanwhile;

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Empower Someone!

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Now I’m all about personal development and being focused on achieving ones goals. But sometimes ambitious people tend to get so absorbed in their own little world that they forget to see the people around them and how they’re feeling. Sometimes someone close to you is feeling lost, unhappy, sad, lonely or something else that they don’t want to bother you with but wishes you would see. Trust me, I know how hard it is for some people to ask for help and support. I’ve been there and I’m still a bit too proud to say “hey, I’m not doing very good at the moment. I really need your presence right now”. Many of us hopes for someone to see how we are feeling and to ask the simple question “how are you?”.

Of course it’s hard to always notice how someone is feeling if they don’t say anything or have a really good poker face. But it’s easy to take a few minutes a week to empower someone by saying something nice. Because a few kind words can make someone’s day!

Tell your partner that tonight’s dinner was delicious.

Comment someone’s Instagram picture with a simple compliment.

Tell your best friend that you miss them.

Tell your mother that her dress looks great on her.

Every day I try to use the time I scroll through my Instagram feed to write some kind comments. I also try to give at least one compliment to everyone I talk to during the day. Make it a habit to make people feel good about themselves. See them. Hear them. Touch them.

Happy Monday and have a lovely week!

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Mood Boosters

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I feel like I’ve become an expert in trying to boost my mood lately. Of course I let myself feel emotions like sadness but not too long. Hours of feeling down is not going to be a habit for me. So I try to cheer myself up after a while. Here are some of my favorite things to do to feel better and happier in the moment;

  • Identify what you’re “suffering” from or what makes you feel down. Search for videos about this topic on Youtube and perhaps find a good TED Talk to cheer you up. Here’s one that cheered me up once about emotional pain and mental health.
  • Listen to songs that fill you up with energy and strength. Listen on repeat if you have to and just disappeared into the music! Some songs that boost me right now are “Can’t Stop the Feeling” by Justin Timberlake and “Alter Ego” by Minus One.
  • Writing! If you haven’t noticed already, I love to write. Either I write down my thoughts, how I’m feeling or small stories about how I want my future to look like.
  • Read a personal development book of your choice. You don’t have to force yourself to start a thick and old one. You can also get a short but giving one.
  • Watch Feel Good-movies.
  • Find interesting events with free entrence.
  • Invite a close friend, cook and talk talk talk.
  • Look for happiness apps, like Happify. It has games and exercices for you to deal with stress, unhappiness, negative thoughts and more.
  • Find an animal to cuddle with. If you don’t have a pet, search for a cat café, or ask someone who has a pet to babysit it!
  • Find a project and put your heart and soul into it.

I hope you can use at least one of these methods to cheer yourself up!

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The Intuition vs The Ego

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The intuition can be known as your soul’s voice, your gut feeling or your heart. When we tell people to listen to their hearts, it means listen to their intuition. The intuition is our inner GPS as my favorite book, “Drömliv”, calls it. It is our inner internet and carries so much knowledge and wisdom, much more than the ego does. The intuition is the voice of our soul. The soul is free from hate, evil and darkness. Your soul is pure. And it loves you. The soul wants the best for you. Whatever it says (what your intuition says), it’s for your own good. Actually it knows what your path looks like. It’s a GPS. It carries as much knowledge as the internet. It knows what you need right here and now to get where you are supposed to. It wants you to have long-term happiness.

The ego, however, is like a reckless driver. Turns and breaks and stomps the gas to gain temporary happiness. The ego is superficial, judgmental and greedy. It’s your ego’s voice who says “your legs look big in these jeans” and other self hating things. It’s not always hateful towards you, but has no idea what the right path is. Therefor, you should not trust it.

As my favorite book puts it; you should rather put your soul in the driver’s seat than the ego. The ego has no idea what road leads to true, long-term happiness. The soul, however, is the GPS which knows exactly where you’re going. It knows how to take smaller roads to save you from obstacles on the way. It wants the best for you, in a long term sense.

Your ego, mind and common sense are different from the intuition. But you can hear them all. How do you know what’s your intuition and what’s your ego? This is the hard part, but fully possible; you just have to practice. Your intuition is always there. But its sound can be blocked by over thinking, emotions and your ego. That is why it’s so important to spend some time alone. When you shut off the world and social media, you are more likely to hear it. Meditation will help you calm down emotionally and clear your head. Ask yourself repeatedly “do I want this?”, “What should I do?” etc. The answer is there. If you’re not sure, keep listening. If you experience a lot of struggle, obstacles and feel nothing but unhappy, it’s a sign that you’re going against the intuition. The intuition will get louder and louder until you do as it says. And then – weight will leave your shoulders, you’ll feel hope and love pouring from your soul.

Example 1 – The intuition knows the true you

My soul knows who I am. I am a girl who likes exclusivity in relationships. I’d rather have one partner than several men. I’d rather share my body with very few than many. That’s just me. Sexuality is a very interesting topic for me, but I prefer exploring it with one person who is special to me. Going in the opposite direction always makes me feel a bit empty and not myself. I admit, I have tried, and have come to the conclusion that being intimate with a person I like makes me happier than being intimate with someone who is just “hot” but means nothing more to me.

Example 2 – What happened this year when I ignored my intuition

This year, I have gone against my intuition a lot. I know that I heard it but I kept ignoring it. And as I described it, it got louder and louder. I got less and less happy. Suddenly, I found myself in a hole I had dug of unhappiness, emotional pain and anxiety. I met obstacle after obstacle. I’ve gone against my intuition in my career, in my relationships and my lifestyle. Finally I started to change certain things about my life. Slowly but surely, I’m getting my old happy self back and the love for life too. I am listening to my intuition as carefully as I can in order to build myself up again. Going against it taught me a lot and I will carry that lesson with me to the next chapter of my life.

Example 3 – What happened when I ignored my intuition a few years back

A few years ago I was in a relationship with a super sweet person. A dream boyfriend, really! He would do everything for me. He had so many qualities. He was one of the most romantic men I had ever met. When I was with him, I thought he was so sweet but I didn’t feel in love or very attracted. I still continued the relationship. Because he was a dream guy, right? I couldn’t be so stupid to give up on a guy like that! But I kept feeling like something was wrong. When I kissed him, it didn’t feel right. When I slept next to him, it didn’t feel right. I started to feel anxious. Why couldn’t I decide? To stay or to go? At one point, I even broke down in tears in school in front of my friends who didn’t understand what was happening. I kept going anyway. Until one day. I felt nothing anymore. I felt like I’d rather study at home than to spend time with him. I finally understood that he wasn’t MY dream boyfriend. He wasn’t right for ME. And if I kept going he would just get hurt. I ended it and – wow. I felt so liberated. The pressure in my chest disappeared. I kept listening to my intuition and I felt like in a flow every day. Positive things came up all the time – good grades, compliments from teachers, fun days with friends, cool opportunities, new exciting contacts… It was amazing to see it in practice.

Basically;

When your ego is in the driver’s seat you’ll experience happiness and joy in small doses. Your life is like a roller coaster. You’ll have rushes of joy just like you have coffee rushes and then it will drop just like the caffeine does after a while. The ego is a reckless driver, remember!

The intuition has a GPS and knows who you truly are and where you have to go. When the intuition is driving, you’ll experience a comfortable ride. You’ll feel this foundation of happiness within you. Whether you have achieved all your goals are not. You enjoy the process. You feel grateful. You love life. And as people love someone who spreads joy, you will attract more positive things in life. You’ll live in a constant flow.

It starts within. It’s not easy. That is why nourishing your relationship to your soul and inner peace is so powerful.

Good luck! ❤

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